there were funny raindrops on the estuary’s surface today, gold from the sand, a school of teeny fish swimming below them. • yesterday lara and i cycled to the beach. we talked about hermit crabs and collected shells to look at and leave behind. i like the waves, even when they’re gentle. it’s funny how they collect bands of shells along the beach, parallel to shore. we ate carrot cake and talked as we pedalled. • had a bit of a bingle with the bike. alls fine – just grazed – but that moment where you go flying and you slide along the concrete and dirt is bloody exhilarating. nice to let go. kind of feel like i’m holding onto everything too hard at the moment (and all the time). always holding fast to things; always wanting to let go but limited in when and how. this is hard.